Going From One to Two Kids
Our baby girl is finally here! I have been thinking of status updates all week about going from one to two kids, but it turns out I’m not that succinct.
Life is beautiful. I was so worried about how we would prepare for a second baby, how the dynamic in our family would shift and, most importantly, how to prepare our toddler for a sibling, and I couldn’t be more surprised, happy and impressed with how the transition has gone.
With Sebastian, I felt a seismic shift. Having a baby completely turned our world upside down and I felt unprepared, overwhelmed and unrecognizable. I’ve heard from some parents that going from one to two kids is easier than the first. But I’ve also heard it’s intense. In our case, it has been a natural transition like she’s been a part of our family this entire time. And Big Brother is SO good about it, it makes my heart swell.
How We Prepared Toddler for Baby #2
I did a lot of Googling/talking to other moms on how to prepare your toddler for a sibling. I honestly think everything we did made such a difference in how he has embraced this change with such love and open arms.
The day we came home from the hospital, Sebastian immediately asked to see and hold the baby. He brought her toys to try and make her happy and the next day, he came home from school and asked why I was holding HIS baby. Every day, he asks to hold and cuddle her and has even taken to singing to her and “reading” her books. We bought him Joanna Cole’s “I’m a Big Brother” and without prompting he’s taken to grabbing the book and “reading” it to the baby.
Other things we did:
- We talked about it for months
- We showed him Daniel Tiger’s Big Brother episode
- Bought this Daniel Tiger book
- Bought this big brother book
- Took him to the store to pick out a toy for little sister (he chose a teddy bear)
- Bought him toys from his little sister (we got him this Color Wonder Art Set, small cars and other random toys.)
By no means am I saying adding another baby into the mix isn’t challenging at times; I’m frustrated when Sebastian needs something and I’m nursing and can’t attend to him. I’m frustrated when HE wakes up more often than she does (she’s only waking once per night, yay!). And I’m frustrated that he’s preferring Dad at the moment because I can’t be there for him as often as I want to. I’m trying to do little things, like taking him places solo when I can, and know that this is a phase that will pass.
Tips for Transitioning to Two Kids
Enlist and Accept Help
Sebastian is in preschool full-time, and if he wasn’t I’m positive it would be a total shit show around here. If you’re flying solo with a toddler and a newborn, definitely enlist and accept help when you can.
Speaking of wrangling two, if you’re chasing after a toddler you’ll probably want to babywear. I’m currently using Baby K’tan and this LILLÉbaby ring sling for the newborn period. I’ve tried other babywearing products in the past which are SO hot, especially living in AZ. The Baby K’tan is mesh (I chose the “Active” one) and the ring sling is 100% linen; baby loves being close and snug to me and I love being hands-free. When she’s a bit older, or for longer baby wearing periods, I plan on using the LILLÉbaby Complete.
Make Time for Short Dates
Whether it’s a quick trip to the grocery store, a birthday party or an hour at the library, I’m doing my best to get some quality 1-on-1 time with Sebastian whenever I can.
Baby is two weeks old today, and I’m sure we have a lot of ups and downs ahead of us! What tips do you have on going from one to two kids?? Would love anything you have to share!
Maternity photos: Kate Nelle Photography
Fresh 48: Andi Marie Photography